Germish
Germish is a hybrid English/german dialect spoken in a private, 'Utiopian' style community, known as Germingland out side of the community, and Germanglia within, based deep in the Bavarilian forests of Southern Germania. Adjectively, the residants are called Germanglians or Germish. The language is richly inflected with both German and English grammar and vocabulary, and can be learned easily by both countrymen. Sounds that do not exist in either language, such as th in German, and the guttural r in English are not rendered, thus making it easier for a standard pronunciation.
Society
The Germish society is a peaceful one. The internal economy is mainly reciprocal, with much of the community’s dairy, meat and vegetable produce produced on the farm, keeping its food profits within the community. Its economy is also helped from its sponsorship deals and tourist trade, in which thousands of yearly visitors are given tours of the community, get to meet the inhabitants, and hear from and meet the people who conceived and brought to fruition the whole idea. There is also a hotel and 4 guest houses in which guests can stay, and partake in the traditional Germish way of life. Tourism and sponshorship generates between €3-4 million annually, and the main sponsor is the Home Improvement giant Aeki, who pay the community for allowing them to use Germingland in their advertising of their flatpack homes.
So why was Germingland created and why come to live here?
One basically comes to Germingland to escape the stress and intrusion of our modern, 'big brother' style society. You won’t see any street cameras here; it’s simply not necessary. There is an incredibly friendly atmosphere. It’s safe, non intrusive, and free will for personal opinion and the freedom to indulge in any religion is totally accepted. The Germish people are happy to help one another in any situation. They give not to receive, as they know that the community will provide for them whenever necessary. And contrary to outside opinion, Germingland is NOT a cult. No one person within the community is 'worshiped' (although the head of Germingland, Wes Daley is highly revered), nor controls the day to day lives of the residents. They have normal everyday material things as we do: TV, satellite, modern, trendy clothes, mobile phones etc, and are also free to travel outside the community at anytime, to visit friends, family (although most families come here as a whole), and holiday. Of course, rules and regulations are evident, as with any community, and non adherence to these rules are duly noted and dealt with in accordance to Germish law. However, it is very rare that the Germish council has to reprimand anyone, since there is a genuine respect for each other and the community itself. This is of course, the pre-requisite for coming here in the first place!
Germish grammar
Germish could be described metaphorically as: German and English shovelled into a cement mixer, poured out and set! It’s basically a blend of German and English grammar and vocabulary. Some simple sentences can sound almost entirely English, for example:
She kan runet. She can run.
Others can sound very German:
Es ist ouf de Tish. It’s on the table.
And others sound typically Germish:
She runet owf di Gras every Taag. She runs on the grass every day.
Quite simply, the blend is as follows:
Most nouns come from German
Most verbs come from English with German style conjugations
Adjectives, adverbs and modifiers come mainly from English
All other word classes are a hybrid mix.
Spelling conforms to a Germish standard
It was decided very early on that Germish would be analytic, that is to say, word order would determine sentence function. The German case and gender system was completely dissolved, and there is no agreement between noun and adjective. In respect of this however, word order would be based on German, the past participle prefix ge was kept for verbs and verbs would take on German style conjugations. Another linguistic feature that doesn’t exist in Germish is the heirachical address Sie as in German. This is because Germish society reflects an 'everyone is equal' attitude. Therefore, having a formal address system would go against the moral grain. Politness and respect can be denoted from voice intonation and facial expression.
Word order
SVO with verb 2nd position in main clause. Past participles and main verbs are sent to the end after modals and auxiliaries as in German. Subordinate clauses see the main verb sent to the end, followed by the auxiliary or modal. However, in a main clause that FOLLOWS a subordinate, that main clause retains its normal word order, unlike in German where the main verb would take 1st position. Eg:
(German) Er hat Füßball gut gespielt.
(Germish) Hee hat Fütbaal güt gepläen.
He had played football well.
(German) Er wird Füßball spielen wenn sie ihn fragen.
(Germish) Hee vil Fütbaal pläet, if dä im asken.
He will play football if they ask him.
But reverse the subordinate clause:
(German) Wenn sie ihn fragen, wird er Füßball spielen.
(Germish) If dä im asken, den hee vil Fütbaal pläet.
If they ask him, then he’ll play football.
TMP (Time, manner, place)
This typically moulds itself on German:
Tüdä meete i mei Froind in di Staat. I’m meeting my friend today in town.
Verbs
Germish verbs are mainly taken from English, but with German style conjugations:
Germish tenses and their English/German equivalents. Since all Germish mainn evrbs are regular, the example used is pläen-to play:
present ich spiele/I play, am playing (also renders the present progressive, or in German, Verlaufsform)
pläen to play-infinitive
i pläe I play/am playing
dü pläest you play/are playing (singular)
hee pläet he plays/is playing
she pläet she plays
es pläet it plays
dä pläen they play
vir pläen we play
man pläet one plays (impersonal)
ir pläet you play (plural)
present perfect ich habe gespielt/I have played
This tense does not use the auxiliary hafen-to have. The past participle itself denotes perfectiveness, and equates to the German perfect past and the English perfect present The pluperfect tense however (as in the English 'had played') does use the appropriate form of hafen with the past participle:
i gepläen I have played
dü gepläen you have played
hee pläen he has played
she gepläen she has played
es gepläen it has played
dä gepläen they have played
vir gepläen we have played
man gepläen one has played
ir gepläen you have played (plural)
simple past ich spielte/I played
Simple past tense adds d before conjugation, or inserts an extra e if following a conjunct:
i pläde I played
dü plädest you played
hee plädet he played
she plädet she played
es plädet it played
dä pläden they played
vir pläden we played
man plädet one played
ir plädet you played
perfect/pluperfect past ich hatte gespielt/I had played (uses appropriate form of hafen plus past participle):
i hafe gepläen I had played
dü hast gepläen you had played
hee hat gepläen he had played
she hat gepläen she had played
es hat gepläen it had played
dä hafen gepläen they had played
vir hafen gepläen we had played
man hat gepläen one had played
ir hat geplälen you had played
future ich werde spielen/I will play, am going to play
This is formed with the future auxiliary vil and the appropriate form of the main verb. Vil has no other use in Germish:
i vil pläe I will play
dü vil pläest you will play
hee vil pläet he will play
see pläet she will play
es pläet it will play
dä pläen they will play
vir pläen we will play
man pläet one will play
ir pläet you will play
perfect future ich werde gespielt haben/I will have played (same for all)
i vil gepläen I will have played
Other tenses
progressive past I was going (not rendered in German)
This tense in English is normally used in 2 ways. It can denote intention: I was going to call but I fell asleep. Or an action that was unfinished or interrupted by something else: I was reading a book when the phone rang.
Germish can equate these expressions in the following way:
Intention:
Use the simple past of intenden-to intend to:
I intendede kaalen, but i feslifden. I was going (intended) to ring but I fell asleep.
Ongoing action that stopped:
Use the simple past of the verb with the preposition as. However, the subordinate clause goes first:
As i a Bük reedede, di Telefon ringdet. I was reading a book when the phone rang.
Verb moods
Conditional would/würde. In Germish, there are 2 conditional moods. The first is a non-sunjunctive mood. This is typically used if the other clause is a but, however or when clause, and is rendered with the Germish auxiliary vud and the appropriate form of the main verb:
Present ich würde spielen/I would play
I vud pläe, but hee asket nish mish I would play, but he doesn't ask me.
Perfect present conditional ich hätte gespielt/I would have played (this can also render the future conditional, this is qualified by statement information)
I vüd gepläen, but hee askedet nish mish I would have played, but he didn't ask me.
Subjunctive conditional
The Germish subjunctive expresses wishes, desires, and those things that, to most people, are just dreams or fantasies. This is formed by changing the vowel sound of the conditional vud to vüd, and is typically used with if clauses:
If i rich vaa, den i vüd ein Ferrari beien. If I were rich, I’d buy a Ferrari.
Subjunctive could
This tense uses could in the sense of being able to do something based on an if or a because clause, for example: "I could be better at maths if I study harder", or "We could be delayed because the train is late". It basically denotes a conditional possibillity. This is rendered with the subjunctive kan which is kün:
I kün daa in 40 minüten bäen, if i depaate now. I could be there in 40 minutes if I leave now.
Imperitive
The Germish imperitive uses the 3rd person singular in harsh or forceful commands. Otherwise, expressions such as directions or polite instructions are simply given as the appropriate pronoun and conjugation.
Sitet! Sit down!
Conjugations and irregular verbs
The verb bäen-to be like in many languages is the most irregular, but only in the present:
i am I am
dü bist you are
hee ist he is
see ist she is
es ist it is
dä ar they are
vir ar we are
man ist one is
ir säd you are
Simple past:
i vaa I was
dü vaast you were
hee vaa he was
see vaa she was
et vaa it was
dä vaan they were
vir vaan we were
man vaa one was
ir vaan you were
Perfective adds ge to vaan for all:
i gevaan I have been
dü gevaan you have been
Pluperfective had been sees a vowel change in the participle, same for all:
i geveen I had been
dü geveen you had been
Hafen-to have
i hafe I have
dü hast you have
hee hat he has
see hat she has
et hat it has
dä hafen they have
vir hafen we have
man hat one has
ir haft you have
Past. There is only one past tense for hafen which is gehafen, and denotes have had. Again, this is the same for all:
i gehafen I have had
dü gehafen you have had
Modal Verbs
Germish modal verbs act as auxiliaries and send the main verb to the end. There is only one form in the present tense, and some are irregular in the past. However, unlike regular German, the main verb does not take infinitive form (unless that form is already used with a pronoun/noun); the appropriate conjugate must be used. They are as follows:
kanen can/to be able to
süden should/to ought to
leiken like/to like
vanten want/to want to
düfen may/to be allowed to
I kan Fütbaal pläe. I can play football.
Dü kan Fütbaal pläest. You can play football.
Vir kan Fütbaal pläen. We can play football.
Past
I kande Fütbaal pläe. I could (was able to/used to be able to) play football.
I gekanden Fütbaal pläen. I could have played football.
I süd Fütbaal gepläen. I should have played. Note: The modal takes no change, tense is denoted from the past participle of pläen.
I leikede Fütbaal pläen, ven i yung waa. I liked to play football when I was young.
- To render have liked is geleiken, and had liked is hafe geleiken. However, these tenses are not used to facilitate main verbs. They’re used in a transitive sense with an object:
I geleiken dish fir lang zeit. I have liked you for a long time.
I hafe geleiken dish fir lang zeit. I had liked you for a long time.
- Note about kan. One must be careful when using kan in the past, as there are 2 forms denoting could. The example above is the correct past tense, meaning was able to. However, there is a subjunctive mood, kün, see the subjunctive above.
I vantede Fütbaal pläen. I wanted to play football.
I gevanten Fütbaal pläen. I have wanted to play football.
I düfde Fütbaal pläen. I was allowed to play football.
Negation
Negation of verbs is rendered with nish which directly relates to not. This typically goes after the verb, but for emphasis can follow the noun (with a little voice intonnation):
Hee güet nish. He’s not going.
Hee leiket nish Fütbaal. He doesn’t like football.
Hee leiket Fütbaal nish! He does NOT like football!
With modals and auxilliaris, the negation word appears with the main verb. This goes AFTER a noun, but where no noun is present, goes after the main verb:
I kan Fütbaal nish pläe. I can’t play football.
I vil güe nish. I will not go.
Negation of objects is rendered with kein, which equates to 'not a' or 'no':
Daa iz kein Stül. There is no chair.
Daa iz kein Chanz, dat tüdä i Fütbaal pläe kan. There is not a chance that I can play football today.
Nouns
Most Germish nouns are German derived. However, there is no case or gender system, therefore all nouns are pretty regular. Plurals are rendered with en on consonant endings, and n on vowel endings. As stated in the word order section, Germish is analytic, therefore noun function relys solely on word order.
Possession
Germish possession equates to both the adjective: my, your, mein, dein etc, and also the German and English genetive: mine, his, of me, meiner, deiner, der Korb des Hunds etc. In an adjectival sense, this also renders the archaic style von mir often used in German, and goes as thus:
mei my
dei your
sei his
shei her
ei its
unsei our
desei their
irei your (plural)
Hee iz mei Froind. He is my friend./He is a friend of mine
Irei Faata gedeien. Their father has died.
And in a genitive sense:
mein mine
dein yours
sein his
shein hers
ein its
unsein ours
desein theirs
irein yours (plural)
